Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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