winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
