Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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