There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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