She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize