Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize
