just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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