So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize