1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
false alarm. still invincible.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
My ass is underappreciated
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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