Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize