Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize