I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises