i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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