I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
