so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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