Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
