I think scott just propositioned me for sex
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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