Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Everclear isn't food dammit
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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