I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize