dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
They are going to name an STD after you.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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