We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
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