Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
