You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
