so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Farmville is her only friend.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You have to summon your inner elephant
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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