ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize