On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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