Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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