He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
