i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
