Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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