I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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