i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
