wat bout pragnant strippers??
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
