Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize