Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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