omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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