So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
