Tell her she can't have a vagina
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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