My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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