At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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