that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
