Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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