im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
