I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
