im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize