Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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