You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize