Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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