So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
