It was confusing and full of hummus
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.