I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful