shes about as inviting as chlamydia
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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